Change is an unavoidable part of life. Whether it’s a career shift, a relationship transition, or unexpected challenges, adapting to new circumstances can feel overwhelming. Many people resist change because it disrupts comfort and familiarity, leading to stress and uncertainty. However, those who embrace change with an open mind and resilient attitude often find growth, new opportunities and greater fulfillment.

   Mental adaptability, the ability to adjust thoughts, emotions and behaviours in response to change, is a key factor in long-term success and well-being. By developing skills like cognitive flexibility, emotional resilience and problem-solving, individuals can navigate transitions with confidence rather than fear. 

   This article explores the psychology behind change, the common reasons people resist it, and practical strategies to strengthen mental adaptability. With the right mindset and tools, anyone can turn change into a powerful force for personal and professional growth.

Understanding Mental Adaptability 

Life is full of transitions— new jobs, shifting from one place to another, unexpected setbacks, relationship shifts or even personal growth. Some people embrace change effortlessly, while others find it unsettling. Mental adaptability refers to the ability to adjust one’s thinking, emotions, and behaviours in response to new situations.

   Psychologists suggest that adaptability is a key predictor of well-being and success. Those who cultivate the skill experience less stress, make better decisions, and are more open to learning. 

   There are two main aspects of mental adaptability:

• Cognitive flexibility: The ability to shift perspectives and think about situations in different ways
• Emotional Resilience: Managing emotions effectively when faced with uncertainty or setbacks. 

   By strengthening these areas, individuals can navigate change with confidence and ease.

The Psychology Behind Change and Resistance

   Change often triggers discomfort because it disrupts familiarity and routine. The brain is wired to seek predictability and security, which is why uncertainty can feel threatening.

   Psychologists highlight several reasons why people resist change:

• Fear of the Unknown: Not knowing what’s ahead can create anxiety.
• Loss of Control: Change can make people feel powerless.
• Comfort Zone Dependence: Familiarity feels safe, even when it’s not beneficial.
• Past Negative Experiences: If change has led to failure before, people may hesitate to try again.

   While resistance is natural, overcoming it is essential for growth. The key is learning how to manage change rather than feeling it.

The Benefits of Embracing Change

  Those who develop mental adaptability experience several benefits:

• Reduced Stress and Anxiety: Accepting change reduces the emotional burden of uncertainty.
• Greater Problem-Solving Skills: Adaptable people can find creative solutions to challenges.
• Increased Confidence: Successfully navigating change builds self-trust.
• Opportunities for Growth: Change often leads to personal and professional development.

Strategies for Building Mental Adaptability

   Developing adaptability takes practice, but small shifts in mindset and behaviour can make a big difference:

1. Cultivate a Growth Mindset:

   A growth mindset, a concept developed by psychologist Carol Dweck, emphasises that abilities and intelligence can develop through effort. Instead of seeing change as a threat, view it as an opportunity to learn.

Tip: Reframe challenges as learning experiences. Instead of thinking, “I can’t do this”, try “I haven’t figured it out yet.”

2. Practise Emotional Agility

   Emotional Agility is the ability to navigate emotions with awareness and flexibility. Instead of suppressing fears about change, acknowledge them and work through them constructively.

Tip: When faced with change, ask yourself, “What emotions am I feeling and how can I address them productively?”

3. Embrace Uncertainty with Curiosity

   Instead of fearing the unknown, approach change with curiosity. Ask yourself, “What new possibilities might this bring?” 

Tip: Try new experiences regularly— explore a new hobby, travel to unfamiliar places, or meet new people to expand your adaptability muscle.

4. Strengthen Resilience through Self-Care

   Mental adaptability requires a strong foundation of resilience. Prioritising self-care helps manage stress and maintain emotional balance during transitions.

Tip: Engage in regular exercise, get enough rest, and practice mindfulness techniques like meditation to build resilience.

5. Develop Problem-Solving Skills

   Adaptable individuals see challenges as solvable rather than overwhelming. Strengthening problem-solving abilities makes navigating change easier.

Tip: When faced with a challenge, break it down into smaller steps and focus on what you can control.

6. Seek Support and Perspective

   Talking to others about change can provide insights and emotional support.

Case Vignette: Daniel’s Journey to Adaptability

Daniel, a 35-year-old software engineer, had worked at the same company for over a decade. When his company announced layoffs, he found himself in an unexpected career transition. Initially he felt anxious, fearing the uncertainty of finding a new job in a competitive industry.

   Instead of resisting change, Daniel decided to embrace adaptability. He started by shifting his mindset— rather than seeing job loss as a failure, he viewed it as an opportunity for growth. He upskilled through online workshops, expanded his network and explored different industries

   To manage stress, he practiced mindfulness and sought support from his career mentors. Within months, Daniel landed a new job that offered better opportunities for advancement. His ability to adapt not only helped him professionally but also strengthened his confidence in handling life’s uncertainties.

   Daniel’s strong highlights that change, while challenging, can lead to positive transformations when approached with the right mindset.

   Embracing change is not about avoiding discomfort but about developing the skills to navigate it effectively. Mental and social adaptability are powerful tools that enable people to manage transitions with confidence and resilience. 

   By cultivating a growth mindset, practising emotional agility, and developing strong social skills, anyone can learn to handle change with ease. Whether it’s a career shift, a personal challenge or a new social environment, adaptability ensures that change becomes a gateway to new possibilities rather than a source of fear.

With patience and practise, embracing change becomes less about survival and more about living. 

Mental health in India has long been shrouded in stigma, yet recent years have seen significant progress in awareness, accessibility, and acceptance. As the country modernises, conversations about mental health are breaking through traditional barriers, influenced by advocacy, media, and policy changes. However, deep-seated cultural beliefs and systemic gaps still hinder widespread acceptance. Bridging the divide between tradition and progress is crucial for the nation’s well-being.

Progress in Indian Mental Health Care

India has taken crucial steps to improve mental health awareness and treatment. Some of the most notable strides include:

1. Legal and Policy Developments

• The Mental Healthcare Act 2017 decriminalised suicide and emphasised the rights of individuals with mental illness, mandating access to care and consent-based treatment.

• The National Mental Health Programme (NMHP) was launched to integrate mental health services into primary healthcare.

• Government initiatives like the Tele Mental Health Assistance and Networking Across States (Tele-MANAS) aim to provide mental health support through digital platforms.

2. Increased Awareness and Advocacy

• Celebrities like Deepika Padukone and Virat Kohli have spoken openly about their mental health struggles, reducing stigma.

• Social media and online platforms have amplified conversations, with NGOs and mental health professionals driving awareness campaigns.

3. Expanding Accessibility

• Online therapy platforms like MindPeers, YourDOST, and Wysa offer affordable mental health care.

• More educational institutions and workplaces are incorporating mental health programs, providing counselling services and stress management resources.

• Rural outreach programs, though still in their infancy, are beginning to address gaps in mental health care accessibility.

The Stigma: Cultural Barriers to Mental Health

Despite these strides, mental health remains a taboo topic in many parts of India. Some of the cultural barriers include:

1. Societal Perceptions and Shame

• Mental illness is often viewed as a sign of weakness or a character flaw rather than a medical condition.

• Families may fear social ostracisation if a member seeks psychiatric help.

• Terms like “paagal” (mad) are casually used, reinforcing negative stereotypes.

2. Religious and Superstitious Beliefs

• Many still believe mental illnesses are caused by karma, black magic, or spirit possession.

• Faith healers and rituals are often sought before professional psychiatric care.

3. Lack of Mental Health Literacy

• Misconceptions about therapy, psychiatric medication, and mental disorders persist.

• Many people assume mental health issues are temporary and can be overcome by willpower alone.

4. Gender and Generational Gaps

• Men are expected to suppress emotions due to societal expectations of masculinity.

• Women’s mental health issues are often dismissed as mood swings or hormonal changes.

• The older generation may resist acknowledging mental health struggles, considering them Western concepts.

The Indian Lens: How Culture Shapes Mental Health Conversations

India’s collectivist culture significantly influences how mental health is perceived and discussed.

Positives:

• Strong Family Support: Families often play a vital role in emotional well-being, offering support during crises.

• Spiritual and Holistic Approaches: Yoga, meditation, and Ayurvedic practices promote mental well-being and have gained scientific validation.

• Community and Social Bonds: Close-knit communities provide emotional support and reduce loneliness.

Negatives:

• Lack of Privacy: Discussing mental health openly within families can lead to breaches of confidentiality.

• Pressure to Conform: Societal expectations around education, marriage, and career often lead to stress and anxiety.

• Denial of Professional Help: Many families prefer to handle issues privately rather than seeking therapy or psychiatric care.

How Can We Move Forward?

To bridge the gap between cultural beliefs and modern mental health care, we must:

1. Promote Mental Health Education: Schools and workplaces should integrate mental health awareness programs.

2. Leverage Digital Platforms: Teletherapy, chat-based counselling, and AI-driven mental health tools can reach rural and underserved areas.

3. Encourage Open Conversations: Normalizing discussions about mental health in families and communities can help reduce stigma.

4. Train Religious and Community Leaders: Many people turn to spiritual leaders for guidance; equipping them with mental health knowledge can facilitate better interventions.

5. Strengthen Mental Health Infrastructure: Increasing the number of psychiatrists, counsellors, and community health workers can address accessibility issues.

A Path to Change

India is at a pivotal moment in its mental health journey. While awareness is growing, deeply rooted stigma remains a challenge. The way forward lies in education, policy enforcement, and cultural sensitivity. By combining traditional values with modern mental health care, India can create a society where seeking help is seen as a strength, not a weakness.

Emotions are an essential part of human experience. They shape our interactions, influence our decision-making and contribute to our overall well-being. However, this can sometimes feel overwhelming, leading to impulsive reaction, stress or conflicts. The ability to regulate emotions is a crucial skill that allows us to navigate life effectively. This article explores the concept of emotional regulation, its psychological background, strategies for managing emotions and a case vignette illustrating these concepts in action.

Understanding Emotional Regulation 

   Emotional regulation refers to the ability to manage and respond to emotional experiences in a way that is adaptive and appropriate for a given situation. It involves recognising emotions, understanding their intensity or expression when necessary. 

   There are two main aspects of emotional regulation:

• Upregulation: Enhancing positive emotions or increasing emotional intensity when needed (e.g., motivating oneself before an important presentation).
• Downregulation: Reducing the intensity of negative emotions to prevent them from becoming overwhelming (e.g., calming down after an argument).

    Some people regulate their emotions naturally, while others may struggle due to personality traits, life experiences or mental health conditions. Fortunately, emotional regulation is a skill that can be learned and improved over time.

The Psychological Background of Emotional Regulation 

   Emotional regulation is deeply rooted in psychology and neuroscience. Several theories and models explain how emotions are processed and controlled:

1. The Process Model of Emotion Regulation

   Proposed by James Gross, this model suggests that emotions are regulated through different strategies, which occur at various stages of emotional processing:

• Situation Selection: Choosing environments that promote positive emotions and avoid distress (e.g., avoiding a toxic workplace).
• Situation Modification: Altering an environment to make it more emotionally manageable (e.g., playing calming music during work).
• Attentional Deployment: Shifting focus to regulate emotions. (e.g., distracting oneself from a stressful situation).
• Cognitive Reappraisal: Changing the way we interpret a situation to modify its emotional impact. (e.g., viewing failures as a learning opportunity).
• Response Modulation: Managing the outward expression of emotions. (e.g., taking deep breaths to stay calm).

The Role of Brain in Managing Emotions

Emotional regulation is primarily controlled by the prefrontal cortex, which is responsible for decision-making and impulse control. It interacts with the amygdala, the brain’s emotional centre, which processes fear, anger and other strong emotions. When emotions run high, the amygdala can override rational thinking, leading to impulsive reactions. A well-regulated emotional response requires effective communication between these brain regions.

Emotional Regulation and Mental Health

Difficulties in regulating emotions are linked to various psychological conditions, including:

• Anxiety Disorders: Excessive worry and difficulty controlling fear responses.
• Depression: Persistent sadness and difficulty generating positive emotions.
• Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD): Intense emotional swings and impulsive behaviours.
• Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD): Difficulty regulating fear and emotional responses due to past trauma.

   Therapies like Cognitive Behavioural Therapy (CBT), Dialectical Behavioural Therapy (DBT) and Mindfulness Based Stress Reduction (MBSR) are often used to help individuals improve their emotional regulation skills. 

Practical Strategies for Regulating Emotions

   Developing emotional regulation skills requires consistent effort and practice. Here are some effective strategies:

Identifying and Labeling Emotions

Many people struggle to regulate emotions because they do not fully understand what they are feeling. Keeping a journal or using emotion-tracking apps can help increase emotional awareness.

Practising Mindfulness and Meditation

Mindfulness involves staying present in the moment and observing emotions without judgement. Research shows that mindfulness meditation can reduce emotional reactivity and increase impulse control.

Cognitive Reappraisal 

Reframing thoughts can significantly change emotional responses. For example, instead of thinking, “I failed and I’m terrible at this”, try “This was a learning experience, and I can improve next time.”

Deep Breathing and Relaxation Techniques

Techniques like diaphragmatic breathing, progressive muscle relaxation and guided imagery can help calm the nervous system and reduce stress responses.

Expressing Emotions in Healthy Ways

Bottling emotions up can end up leading to emotional outbursts. Talking to a trusted friend, writing in a journal or engaging in creative activities can provide an outlet for emotions.

Engaging in Physical Activity

Exercise releases endorphins, which are natural mood boosters. Activities like yoga, running or dancing can help regulate emotions.

Setting Boundaries and Managing Triggers

Recognising situations that trigger intense emotions and setting boundaries can help prevent unnecessary emotional distress.

Seek Professional Support

If emotional regulation is a persistent struggle, therapy or counselling can provide valuable strategies tailored to individual needs.

Case Vignette: Monica’s Journey to Emotional Regulation 

Monica, a 28-year-old marketing professional, often found herself overwhelmed by emotions. She struggled with anxiety and frequently had emotional outbursts at work. Whenever she received critical feedback, she would become defensive, cry or withdraw. This affected her job performance and relationships with colleagues.

   Monica decided to work on her emotional regulation. She started by identifying her emotional triggers- she realised that criticism reminds her of childhood experiences where she felt unworthy. Understanding this connection helped her practise cognitive reappraisal, reminding herself that feedback was meant to help her grow, not harm her.

   She also incorporates mindfulness practices into her daily routine. Before meetings, she took deep breaths to center herself. If she felt overwhelmed, she would step outside for a brief walk instead of reacting impulsively. 

   Over time, Monica developed healthier coping strategies. She started keeping a journal to process emotions and sought support from a therapist, who introduced her to DBT skills like distress balance and interpersonal effectiveness. These tools helped her regulate emotions and communicate effectively. 

   After several months, Monica noticed a significant improvement. She was no longer easily overwhelmed by criticism and could approach challenges with a calmer mindset. Her colleagues even commented on her newfound confidence. By committing to emotional regulation strategies, Monica transformed not only her emotional well-being but also her professional personal relationships.

   Emotional regulation is a vital skill that influences every aspect of life, from mental health to relationships and career success. While some individuals may naturally regulate emotions well, others can develop these skills through awareness, practice and professional guidance. By implementing strategies like mindfulness, cognitive reappraisal and relaxation techniques, individuals can gain better control of their reactions to situations and regulate emotions accordingly. 

    Just like Monica, anyone can live a fulfilling life and regulate emotions with patience and effort. Understanding emotions and applying them effectively can make significant changes in how we experience and respond to life’s changes. 

Mental health is as important as physical health but usually gets less attention. With the increasing number of mental health disorders, from anxiety and depression to more serious psychiatric illnesses such as schizophrenia, the demand for professional mental health treatment has never been higher. Psychology and psychiatry, although two separate disciplines are two sides of the same coin. Psychologists are trained to study human behaviour and emotions, whereas psychiatrists are trained to study the biological and medical nature of mental illness. When these two work together, patients are given comprehensive care catering to emotional and physiological needs.

Understanding Psychology and Its Role in Mental Health

Psychology is a scientific discipline investigating behaviour, thoughts, and feelings. Psychologists assist in making people realise their mental and emotional issues with the help of different methods, including psychotherapy, cognitive-behavioural therapy (CBT), and counselling. Their mission is to provide coping mechanisms, emotional support, and behavioural therapy to assist patients in coping with stress, trauma, and psychiatric disorders.

Psychologists do not prescribe drugs but are essential in the identification and treatment of mental health conditions. They employ tests and therapeutic techniques to assist patients in coping with life’s problems. Psychologists, clinical psychologists, and therapists provide varying levels of intervention based on the severity of the condition.

The Role of Psychiatry in Mental Health Care

Psychiatry, however, is a branch of medicine that involves the diagnosis, treatment, and prevention of mental illnesses. Psychiatrists are licensed professionals who prescribe medication to treat chemical imbalances in the brain. Schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, and major depressive disorder are some of the conditions that usually need pharmacological treatments in addition to therapy.

Though medication may be used to stabilise a patient’s condition, it is not necessarily a complete solution. This is where psychiatrists and psychologists work together to provide a complete treatment. Psychiatry deals with the biological aspects of mental illness, while psychology offers the emotional and behavioural counselling required for successful recovery.

Psychotherapy and Counseling: The Bridge Between Psychology and Psychiatry

Psychotherapy andcounsellingg provide a bridge between the two professions. Whether cognitive-behavioural therapy (CBT), psychodynamic therapy, or humanisticcounsellingg, these treatments educate individuals about their thoughts and actions. Psychotherapy benefits mild to severe mental illnesses and tends to be used in conjunction with psychiatric treatment.

Counsellors and therapists work closely with psychologists and psychiatrists, ensuring that patients receive emotional support while undergoing medical treatment. For example, a person with depression may receive antidepressants from a psychiatrist while attending therapy sessions with a psychologist to address underlying emotional issues. This dual approach enhances treatment effectiveness.

Why Psychiatry and Psychology Must Work Together

Mental illnesses are complex and multi-layered. A one-fits-all is not an option. The most effective mental health care model encompasses psychiatric and psychological perspectives. Here’s why their teamwork is essential:

Holistic Diagnosis and Treatment

Psychiatrists determine the causes of mental illness through medical and biological means, and psychologists assess behaviour and emotions. Combined, they develop a better and more integrated diagnosis.

Certain mental health disorders are treated with medication, while others are helped more by therapy. In most situations, a combination of both will work best.

Meeting Both Immediate and Long-Term Needs

Psychiatry addresses immediate symptom treatment with medication, while psychology addresses long-term emotional and behaviour shifts.

Decreasing Stigma Surrounding Mental Health Treatment

Most individuals shy away from psychiatric care because of misperceptions about medication. Having a psychologist assist a psychiatrist is helpful because the patient can better understand the advantages of an integrated treatment plan.

Personalized Treatment

Each patient is different, and their treatment should be. An integrated method guarantees personalized care that addresses psychological and biological issues.

Perceiving Mental Health as an Integrated Field

Instead of perceiving psychology and psychiatry as distinct entities, we ought to recognize them as complementary forces moving in the same direction—improving mental health care for everybody. The ideal mental health care system merges both professions, ensuring that clients have the best possible and humane treatment.

Healthcare systems, policymakers, and medical facilities must promote interdisciplinary cooperation for better patient outcomes. Patients who need assistance should also be willing to receive a multi-treatment regimen, knowing that therapy and medicine can complement each other to achieve better mental health. 

Conclusion

Psychology and psychiatry are not conflicting forces but allies in mental health care. As long as they coexist, when they collaborate, patients have a balanced, effective way of treatment. By closing the gap between medical intervention and emotional support, they establish a mental health system that actually serves the needs of the mentally ill. A combined, integrative effort guarantees the best results, supporting the theory that when it comes to mental health, it does take two to tango.

In today’s fast-paced world, it’s easy to feel overwhelmed. We’re constantly surrounded by advertisements telling us to buy more, work harder and chase success. But despite having more than ever, many people feel stressed, anxious and unhappy. 

   This is where we can find minimalism. Minimalism is about simplifying life by focusing on what truly matters and letting go of unnecessary distractions— whether that’s physical clutter, mental stress or unhealthy habits. More than just a design trend, minimalism can bring peace, clarity and happiness.

   This article will explore how minimalism can improve your life, why too many things can be stressful and how to start making changes that lead to a calmer, more fulfilling life.

The Burden of Excess

Think about how you feel when you walk into a messy room. It’s hard to focus, right? Maybe you feel a little irritated, distracted or even anxious. On the other hand, when you walk into a clean, organised space, you probably feel more relaxed and in control. 

   This happens because clutter, whether in your home, your schedule or your mind, creates stress. This phenomenon is known as cognitive overload, the idea that too much information or too many choices overwhelm our brains, making it harder to focus and think clearly. 

How Clutter Affects Your Mind

• It’s mentally exhausting: Every item in your space takes up some of your attention. The more things you have, the more decisions you have to make— what to wear, what to clean and when to clean things. This drains your mental energy to a great extent.
• It makes you feel out of control: A cluttered space can make you feel like life is chaotic, which increases stress.
• It’s distracting: A messy environment makes it harder to focus on work, relax or even sleep well.

   A study found that people in cluttered homes tend to have higher stress levels than those in tidy places. The reason for this would be that a messy environment sends a signal to your brain that there’s unfinished work, making it hard to truly relax.

The Benefits Of Minimalism

Minimalism isn’t about living in an empty house or getting rid of everything you own. It’s about choosing what truly adds value to your life and letting go of the rest. When you do this, you create more space — physically, mentally, and emotionally — for the things that truly matter. 

Here’s how minimalism can improve your life:

Less Anxiety and Stress

When you remove clutter from your home and life, you create a sense of calm. A clean simple space helps your mind relax because there’s less to worry about. 

   Studies show that people feel happier and more at peace in uncluttered, organised spaces. A simpler home leads to a clearer mind.

More Freedom

Owning too much can be a burden. You spend more time cleaning, organising and maintaining things. The more you own, the more responsibility you have. 

   Minimalism gives you the freedom to focus on truly what matters, whether that’s travel, relationships, personal growth, or hobbies, because you’re not weighed down by unnecessary.

Better Focus and Productivity 

A cluttered environment makes it harder to concentrate. Think about a messy desk, your mind feels scattered, and getting work done takes longer.

   When you simplify your surroundings, your brain has fewer distractions, making it easier to focus and be productive. Many successful people like Steve Jobs, were known for keeping things simple to save mental energy for important decisions.

More Appreciation for What You Have

One of the biggest problems with modern life is always wanting more — more clothes, more gadgets, more money. But studies show that people who practice gratitude are happier than those who constantly chase new things. 

   Minimalism helps you appreciate what you already have instead of always wanting more. When you’re surrounded by only the things you love and need, you naturally feel more content.

Stronger Relationships 

Minimalism isn’t just about physical things, it’s about how you spend your time. Many people are so busy working and chasing success that they forget to spend quality time with loved ones.

   By simplifying your schedule and focusing on what truly matters, you create more time for family, friends and meaningful experiences. And in the end, relationships bring far more happiness than material things.

Practical Steps To Embrace Minimalism

Minimalism isn’t about throwing away overnight. It’s about making small, intentional changes that lead to a simpler, happier life. 

Here are some easy ways to get started:

Declutter Your Space

• Start small — one room, one closet or even one drawer at a time. 
• Ask yourself, “Dows this item add value to my life?”, “Do I use it regularly?”
• Donate, sell or recycle items you no longer need.

Simplify Your Digital Life

• Unsubscribe from unnecessary emails and notifications.
• Delete unused apps and organise your digital files.
• Limit social media time to reduce mental clutter.

Practice Comscious Consumption

• Before making a purchase, ask yourself, “Do I truly need this?”
• Focus on quality over quantity. Invest in durable, meaningful items rather than impulse buys.

Prioritise Experience Over Things

• Spend money on experiences — travel, learning or spending time with loved ones, rather than accumulating material possessions.
• Create memories instead of collecting objects.

Embrace a Mindful Routine

• Simplify your daily schedule by focusing on what truly matters.
• Practice meditation or journaling to clear mental clutter.
• Set boundaries to protect your time and energy.

Minimalism and Long-term Happiness

Minimalism is not about deprivation, it’s about intention. It’s about choosing what adds value to your life and letting go of what doesn’t. Over time, this mindset shift leads to lasting happiness, reduced stress and greater peace.

   Studies in positive psychology highlight that long-term happiness is linked to purpose, relationships and self-growth, not possessions. When we align our lives with these principles, we cultivate a deeper sense of fulfillment. 

   In a world that constantly tells us we need more, minimalism reminds us that we already have enough. By simplifying our spaces, habits and thoughts, we create room for what truly matters. Whether it’s finding peace in a decluttered home, enjoying meaningful relationships or experiencing personal freedom, minimalism offers a path to a more intentional and fulfilling life.

   Ultimately, true peace doesn’t come from what we own, it comes from who we are and how we choose to live.