You might occasionally ask yourself,

Why do I act this way?

Why am I so affected by my connections with others?

Why do I approach my relationships the way I do?

Why do I behave differently with my closest person?

Why am I so attached to them?

Why is conflict with my partner so difficult to handle?

The root of all these questions lies in your attachment style. Understanding your attachment style is key to any interpersonal relationship, as these patterns of behaviour form during early childhood and impact how we connect with others in our later life according to the attachment theories by Bowlby and Ainsworth. These attachment styles stem from our early interactions with our primary caregivers, usually our parents. How they respond to our needs shapes our attachment style and sets expectations for future relationships. Knowing your attachment style is essential for understanding your behaviour with others. Offering insight into how others perceive you, and fostering better communication with your loved ones. There are four attachment styles developed by Ainsworth which we practice effectively till today as well- Anxious, Secure, Disorganised and Avoidant.

 Here we understand the crux of an anxious attachment style, its characteristics and how to modify this style.

What is an anxious attachment style?

Anxious attachment style, also known as “preoccupied” attachment, is a pattern of relating to others characterised by a fear of abandonment, a strong need for closeness, and emotional dependency on relationships. This attachment style develops in childhood if caregivers are inconsistent in their emotional availability or responsiveness. People with this attachment style often feel insecure about their relationships, fearing that their partner or loved ones may leave or not love them as much as they need. Some of the characteristics of this attachment style are of

• constant reassurance and validation
• worrying excessively about the intentions of others 
• clingy or possessive 

  Indicators of this style are the characteristics but how they are presented to the outside world. These often show up in relationships and how a person manages emotional connections. Some of the indicators of having an anxious attachment style are:

Fear of abandonment

Fear of abandonment is the constant fear, anxiety or worry that your partner or close ones will stop caring about you. It is triggered on instances where you think the other people do not meet your needs. Here is an example of this. Alana recently got into a relationship and finds it extremely hard to part ways with her partner. She constantly worries that her partner will leave her for another person. She hence manifests this fear into the excessive need for reassurance that they will not leave her, checking her partner’s phone and also jumping to conclusions. 

Fear of being alone

People with an anxious attachment style often have a profound fear of being alone and jump into relationships often. You might feel incomplete or uncomfortable without a romantic partner or close relationships. Prerana is a young woman who is competent in her career and has absolute trust in her colleagues but she has an extreme fear of being alone and manifests this quality as being in a toxic relationship detrimental to her mental health. She expresses to her therapist that she handles the aggressive behaviour of her partner because of the fear of being alone. She chooses to stay in an unhealthy relationship because of the fear of being single or alone. Often she tolerates this behaviour she wouldn’t otherwise to maintain the connection.

Overanalysing interactions 

This is an important aspect of the anxious attachment style. You might end up reading too much into small things like texts or tone of voice and interpreting neutral or ambiguous behaviours as rejection or disinterest. You may sometimes dwell on minor things objectively, like how long it took for your partner to respond to your message, or interpret neutral actions (like a casual remark or change in body language) as major signs of disinterest and rejection.

  It is often observed that these behaviours can cause a cycle in relationships where the partner feels overwhelmed by the anxious person’s demands for closeness. This can further intensify the anxious person’s fears and emotional reactions.

How do we modify?

While we have come to understand the markers of an anxious attachment style .We also need to acknowledge the detrimental effects it can cause to ourselves and others around us. Here are some of the ways you can improve to form a much more secure bond with your partner and other close relationships:

Build

Self-awareness is one of the pillars of knowing yourself. Recognising repeated patterns and recognising that you have this attachment style can instil a change in you to start to understand yourself and change accordingly. An advice around this modification would be to notice when situations trigger your feelings of anxiety or fear of abandonment. Reflecting on these triggers can help you understand their roots and help you work towards the goal of having a positive experience in relationships. A therapist can help you understand the origin of these triggers and help you manage them effectively. 

Develop

By building self-awareness and recognising patterns and triggers, you are understanding the context behind your actions. The next step would be to develop a few techniques that can help you manage and cope with your triggers. A few of the techniques that can help you achieve your goals are developing self-soothing techniques, practising mindfulness and using positive self-talk. Self-soothing techniques like relaxation techniques (JPMR, guided imagery, deep breathing, meditation) can help you stay calm and relaxed after a trigger has intensified your emotions. Practising mindfulness techniques can help you achieve the goal of staying in the present moment rather than focusing and ruminating about the past or the future, this is an effective way to help you cope with anxiety-related thoughts. Positive self-talk is an important booster of confidence. Statements like “You can handle it”, “It’s okay to feel this way, let’s try to manage it”, “You have people who love you around you” and many more can create a great sense of confidence to be instilled within yourself.

Practice 

After understanding yourself and further understanding what type of technique works best for your anxiety, the next step would be to practice these steps every time an anxiety-inducing situation appears. It is apparent to acknowledge that change is a gradual and slow process so clouding yourself with the perception that your attachment style will change after using these steps once or twice is a misguided perspective to hold. However small and consistent efforts to practice these steps and also seeking professional help can lead to more secure and fulfilling relationships. 

  In conclusion, the Anxious attachment style is rooted in early childhood experiences and becomes more important to address considering the challenges it presents to yourself. Markers of this attachment style include constant reassurance and validation, fear of abandonment, fear of being alone, overanalysing interactions, clinginess and overbearing and many more. Since these actions lead to a cycle where the partner becomes overwhelmed by the anxious partner and also intensifies the reaction of the latter, certain modifications can be made to reach a level of security. These modifications are building self-awareness, developing techniques to manage these reactions and practising them effectively. 

Poetry is like a forest of mystery. Out of all the different forms of writing it’s poetry that is the hardest to master and easiest to decipher. It’s easy to decipher as at the end of the day one tends to unravel the mystery behind those few words based on their own experiences and situation. There is obviously a side that the poet wants you to see, but there is also a side that you perceive which is equally unique. It is often hard to understand what the poet is trying to say given we may at times don’t even live in the same era. But a poet who masters the art of expressing what they wants while also giving you the space to explore your perspective is truly a genius. Let’s look through the pages of one such genius, Bidyut Bhushan Jena and his debut poetry collection, Pages. 

Pages: A Closer Look

Consisting of just over 100 pages, Pages is a collection of poetry that is bound to take you on a trip down memory lane. It is especially true for those hailing from the state of Odisha but stranded on different shores all over India. As a poet, Jena explored the concept of joy, happiness, nostalgia and even death in depth. Each piece in Pages seems to be an etching from the poet’s life. A raw piece of memory carved out with very little fine-tuning that gives it its iconic flair.

Many may object to the rawness of the themes and imageries portrayed in Pages, but personally, I feel that it is this rawness deprived of any refinement and polish that makes this one of the greatest works by this poet. The writing will remind you of Plath given that it is a form of confessional poetry and is heavy with imagery. For an Odia soul stranded in the middle of nowhere these imageries act like a blueprint of home. As a poet, Jena has given his readers what they want the most, i.e., a sanctuary.

The words carry a deeper undertone that can only be truly cherished when one immerses oneself in the pages of Pages. From reminding the reader about a time when “sandhya aarti” was sacred to any Odia kid to talking about age-old buildings and trees that carry the nostalgia and playfulness of days gone by, Pages, though deeply rooted in the customs of Odia culture, manages to carry a universal tone with its metaphors and images that bring to halt a moment in the past. And that’s the brilliance of Jena’s work.

Afterword

Pages by Jena is a book that is packed with nostalgia and emotions that run deeper than any memory. From reminding you of the gentle easy days of the past when loving someone just required you to fall for someone for who they are and life was not so complicated as you waited for your father to return back from work with treats at hand and a broad smile on his face, to delving into the darker side of life that is death and coming to terms with it, Pages is a book for a day when you just want to sit back and enjoy the act of reading.

World Suicide Prevention Day is annually observed by people all around the world on September 10th. This day brings home the fact that within scary numbers of deaths by suicide are real lives, families, and communities considerably and deeply affected by this issue. WSPD is an opportunity for reflection, awareness and most importantly, to prevent suicide and support those in need.

Global Context of Suicide

According to the WHO, every year, almost 700,000 people die by suicide, and many more attempt it. Suicide is a significant public health problem and has remained one of the leading causes of death among people aged 15-29 years worldwide. These figures represent only the tip of an iceberg. For each death by suicide, hundreds of people suffer severe psychological, emotional, and social impacts. Such extreme measures have consequences in that families and societies are battling to come to terms with grief, confusion, and possibly feelings of guilt that may follow, many times at a loss as to how to go further.

The Theme: Creating Hope Through Action

The theme for World Suicide Prevention Day, “Creating Hope Through Action,” will be immediately linked to a message that suicide is preventable, and each one of us can play a part in that process. Whether through giving a listening ear, reaching out to someone in distress, or raising awareness of mental health issues, any action has the potential to save a life. It is also a call for building resilient support systems and access to mental health resources wherever people are.

Recognising the Warning Signs

Early identification of warning signs and timely intervention are among the best ways of preventing suicide. These include warning signs in the form of emotional, verbal, or behavioural warnings:

a. Sudden loss of interest in social activities or any relationship

b. Increased use of substances or self-harm behaviour

c. The feeling or talking about hopelessness or burdening others

d. Extreme mood swings or changes in behaviour

e. Talking or writing about death or suicide

It also needs to be pointed out that these signs could even differ from one individual to another. This is where recognition and taking proactive steps by reaching out and offering support can make a difference.

Breaking the Stigma Associated with Mental Health

One of the significant reasons taken into consideration in suicide prevention is the stigma surrounding mental health. Suicidal ideation and mental illness are more likely to connote feelings of shame or hesitation to seek help among people because of their judgment by society. This stigma deters candid communications and results in individuals failing to pursue the care they desperately need.

These will go a long way in ensuring that the stigma is reduced because mental health is talked about with an open mind and without any judgment. Public campaigns, media engagement, and educational programs light up avenues that normalise seeking mental health and encourage people in struggle to seek support.

The Role of Communities

Communities are at the heart of efforts to prevent suicide. Communities develop a culture in which openness, support, and compassion increase to try to minimise suicidal thoughts and feelings of isolation and give reasons to live. Communities can raise awareness of problems associated with mental health issues, enhance resilience, and ensure that resources like hotlines, counselling services, and support groups are readily accessible.

They can also be provided through local organisations, schools, workplaces, and faith-based groups by creating safe spaces where people are heard and valued. Such settings offer an open avenue for them to discuss their problems and access the help they need.

What Can You Do?

Though broad-scale prevention methods are critical, all of us can play our part in preventing suicide. Following are a few ways one can help create a big difference:

1. Listen: If anyone is distressed, empathise with them. Sometimes, your presence can help people come out of their suicidal thoughts.

2. Seek help: If you know someone who shows suicide warning signs, get them professional help: a mental health professional, helpline – whatever may be the need.

3. Raise awareness: Participate in WSPD events, share mental health resources via social media, or simply bring up discussions of mental well-being amongst your networks.

4. Support survivors: If people have lost their loved ones to suicide, give them space to grieve and heal. Sometimes, your mere presence counts, even in complete silence.

Moving On

World Suicide Prevention Day reminds us that suicide is not inevitable. Most suicides can be prevented through raising awareness, reducing stigma, and taking collective action. Whether offering a kind word or advocating for systemic change, every action counts.

By creating hope through action, we can take further steps toward supporting those in need and also foster a society that prioritises mental health, hope and allows no man to feel alone in their struggle.

With the recent advancement in medical technology, we hope to find a cure for all illnesses be it because of bacteria or viruses. But in the meantime, while we search for a cure for even the common cold there are many sicknesses spreading around us that we must remain aware of. Being aware is as good as having the Doraemon’s magic pocket, you may not always need all the gadgets or in your case the knowledge of particular illnesses, but if you ever need it you can always look back to that knowledge and feel prepared. One such illness that has been on the rise recently is Mpox or Monkey Pox, let’s find out more about it.

Mpox: What is it?

Mpox is a virus which is a member of the Orthopoxvirus genus. A virus is different from bacteria as bacteria can be cured easily with antibiotics and the illness that a bacteria causes is called a bacterial infection. But when it comes to viruses they are hard to treat and the illness that they cause is called viral infection. As they are hard to treat, they are allowed to run their course and fight with your body’s immune system until they lose. Though there are some antiviral medications available for certain viral infections like HIV, for most viral infections there is no medication as such. Your common cold is considered a viral infection hence usually the best cure for a common cold is to rest up and let your body fight it. On the other hand, tetanus is a bacteria that you can fight with, with a tetanus shot.

The particular genus or family the Mpox or monkeypox virus belongs to was also responsible in the past for the spread of cowpox and smallpox. The reason it is called monkeypox is because it was first discovered in 1958 in monkeys. But unlike the name suggests this virus can attack both humans and animals and hence we need to be more careful. Some of its symptoms such as headache, fever, exhaustion, and muscle aches can be confused with other viral infections. But one of the most noticeable symptoms of this disease is the appearance of rashes. The rashes first look like flat lesions or like a patch of red on your skin, that develops into a blister and then a scab. This is the most important marker of the disease.

Mpox: How do I protect myself from it?

Mpox can only be transmitted via direct contact with the infected person’s or animal’s rash or their bodily fluids like saliva, blood, etc. It can also be transmitted via air through respiratory droplets which are released when you cough, sneeze, talk or breathe hard, hence taking important precautions is of utmost importance. You can do the following to protect yourself from Mpox:

• Maintain Good Hygiene:

Always ensure to wash your hands before and after you eat with soap and water to ensure that all the germs from your hands are dead. Whenever you visit very crowded places remember to come back and change out of your clothes and clean the exposed parts of your body with soap and water to prevent contamination. Whenever you are visiting crowded public places like gyms be sure to wipe the surface of gym equipment with wet tissue before using them.

• Love Animals But Don’t Catch Mpox:

We all love to give our furry buddies all the love in the world but remember that loving them is fine but do it with caution. Mpox virus is mostly spread through rodents (such as rats, hamsters, squirrels, guinea pigs, etc.) and primates (such as chimpanzees, gorillas, monkeys, orangutans, etc.) in areas where the disease is already on the rise like Africa, hence be careful when coming into contact with animals in those regions.

• Take Your Vaccine Shot:

Remember to take your due vaccine shots such as JYNNEOS or ACAM2000 to ensure that you are fully prepared and protected from Mpox. Needles hurt but also save lives so close your eyes and imagine you are in your happy place and it will make the entire vaccination process a little easier.

• Keep Yourself Away From People Who Have Caught Mpox:

Sometimes the best way you can take care of someone is by staying away. Hence, let the doctors who are much more experienced handle the situation while you keep yourself healthy so that when the time comes you can help out as much as you can. Do not share beddings, clothing, towels or personal items with someone who has Mpox. And disinfect surfaces and objects that may have been contaminated with antiseptic lotions like Dettol.

• Improve Your Immunity:

Given that viral infections fight with their immunity it’s important to build a strong immune system. By eating a balanced diet, getting a good 7-8 hours of sleep and being active through various activities like exercise, dance, etc. you can ensure that your immune strength is at its best all the time. 

Stay safe so that you can ensure somebody else’s safety tomorrow.  

Crippled, disabled, differently abled, specially-abled, etc. are a few of the many terms that society uses to describe those who deviate from the normal they are used to seeing. It’s an assumption that is made that if one becomes a little different as compared to how a society is used to perceive a “whole” individual then they truly can’t live a fulfilling and happy life. It is this assumption that people who society had categorised as different are forcing it to rethink with their consistent march to victory in the Paris Paralympics 2024. You guessed it right, we are talking about none other than the Indian team’s performance at the Paris Paralympics 2024 who are making billions across India to reframe their thoughts and perception towards those who may not look like an exact replica of what they conventionally consider “healthy”. 

Medals Tally Paris Paralympics 2024 (Shooting, Track, High Jump)

The Indian para-athletes have consistently proved that they don’t need to fit themselves into the tiny tick boxes that society has created that may deem them unfit. They did so by bringing honour and glory to the nation one medal at a time. Starting this streak of pride, Avani Lekhara won India’s first gold medal in women’s 10m air rifle standing SH1. Mona Agarwal also won the bronze in the same event. 

Preethi Pal carried this streak forward by winning India’s first-ever medal in track. She did so with a bronze in both the women’s 100m T35 (athletics) and the women’s 200m T35 (athletics). Manish Narwal brought a silver home with his win at the men’s 10m air pistol SH1 (shooting). And so did Rubina Francis with a bronze women’s 10m air pistol SH1 (shooting). Nishad Kumar with his silver in men’s high jump T47 (athletics) and Yogesh Kathuniya with his bronze in men’s discus throw F56 (athletics) showed a repeat of their impeccable performance at the Tokyo Games 2020. 

Medals Tally Paris Paralympics 2024 (Badminton, Track, High Jump, Archery)

Nitesh Kumar bagged the second gold medal for India in men’s singles SL3 (badminton). Thulasimathi Murugesan kept the spirits of Indians high with her silver in women’s singles SU5 (badminton). Manisha Ramadass and Nithya Sre Sivan added to India’s overall medal tally by winning bronze each in women’s singles SU5 (badminton) and women’s singles SH6 (badminton) respectively. With Suhas Yathiraj’s silver in men’s singles SL4 (badminton) India bagged a total of five medals in the badminton events alone.

Sharad Kumar with a silver in men’s high jump T63 (athletics) managed to bag his second medal at the Paralympics. Mariyappan Thangavelu bagged the bronze in the same event. Becoming the youngest Indian track medalist, Deepthi Jeevanji won a bronze in the women’s 400m T20 (athletics). Rakesh Kumar along with Sheetal Devi managed to bag the bronze medal in the mixed team compound open (athletics). This win made Sheetal Devi the youngest Indian medalist to be awarded a Paralympic medal in compound archery.

Medals Tally Paris Paralympics 2024 (Javelin Throw, Shot Put, Archery, Club Throw)

Sumit Antil one of the flag bearers of the Indian flag during the opening ceremony, carried the flag with pride as he won a gold in javelin throw F64 (athletics). It made it the third gold for India in the Paralympics. His win was followed up by a silver and bronze medal. They were bagged by Ajeet Singh and Sundar Singh Gurjar respectively in men’s javelin throw F46 (athletics).

Bringing home the fifth silver medal Sachin Khilari bagged the silver medal in men’s shot put F46 (athletics). It was further followed up by Pranav Soorma who bagged the silver in men’s club throw 51 (athletics). Harvinder Singh kept the spirit of millions of Indians alive by bagging India’s first Paralympic gold in men’s individual recurve open (archery). Dharambir Nain brought the current tally of gold medals for India to five. He did so by winning a gold medal in the men’s club throw 51 (athletics). And just yesterday, i.e., 05/09/2024, India’s medal tally went up to 25. Yesterday, judoka Kapil Parmar brought home the bronze medal in the men’s 60kg J1 event at the Paris Paralympics 2024. 

The Reason Behind the Massive Success

The immense passion and effort put in by each athlete surely played a role in their success. But apart from that certain other factors also had a role to play. According to the Business Standard, it’s the help from the government which includes an increment in the funding for the Paris Paralympics, backing up athletes with government schemes and sending in more coaches and personnel support to the Paralympics helped boost the morale and kept the athletes going. The inclusion of para-badminton last year also gave more space for athletes to showcase their talents. The recovery centre established in the Games village especially for the Indian athletes also played a crucial role.

Proving the notion held against people who live with disabilities wrong with each medal we just want to say that we are immensely proud of the performance of all our athletes at the Paris Paralympics 2024. And we wish them all the best for the remaining days of the Paralympics.