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Reclaim Your Power: The Art of Setting Boundaries

Having trouble saying no, making your boundary clear or setting your own pace? Here is your guide to setting own boundaries.

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boundaries , psychological, self, therapist, relationship

  In our interconnected and increasingly fast-paced world, setting personal boundaries is a crucial skill that many overlook. Healthy boundaries define where one person ends, and another begins, creating a sense of individual autonomy and self-respect. They are essential for mental health, healthy relationships and overall well-being. This article explores the psychological foundations of boundary setting, its significance and offers insights into applying this practice, concluding with a brief case study illustrating its transformative power.

The Psychological Perspective 

Psychologically, boundaries are invisible lines that separate our thoughts, feelings, and physical space from others. They dictate what we are willing to accept or tolerate in our interactions and relationships. Boundaries can be physical (e.g., personal space), emotional (e.g., sharing personal feelings), or cognitive (e.g., protecting one’s beliefs or opinions) . 

   The development of personal boundaries begins in early childhood. Influenced by parenting styles, attachment patterns, and social learning, children learn how to establish and maintain boundaries. Securely attached children often grow up with a clear sense of self and stronger boundaries, as their caregivers respected their autonomy while providing guidance. Conversely, those raised in enmeshed or neglectful environments may struggle to define and uphold boundaries, potentially leading to issues such as dependency, resentment or conflict. 

    In psychology, boundary-setting is closely related to self-concept, self-esteem and emotional regulation. A well-defined self-concept allows individuals to recognise their needs and limitations, while healthy self-esteem empowers them to assert these needs without guilt. Conversely, individuals with poor self-esteem or unclear boundaries may feel obligated to prioritise others over themselves, leading to burnout, anxiety or interpersonal strife

The Psychological Benefits of Setting Boundaries

Improved Mental Health 

Boundaries are critical for protecting mental health. Without them, individuals may find themselves overcommitted, overwhelmed or emotionally drained. Boundaries help individuals avoid overextending themselves and create space for self-care, which is essential for managing stress, anxiety and depression.

Enhanced Relationships

Clear boundaries foster mutual respect and understanding in relationships. They prevent misunderstandings, reduce resentment and promote healthy communication. By setting boundaries, individuals communicate their values and needs, paving the way for more authentic connections.

Increased Self-esteem

When individuals assert their boundaries, they send themselves a powerful message: “My needs and feelings matter”. This practise bolsters self-esteem me reinforces self-worth, as it aligns one’s actions with personal values and priorities 

Greater Autonomy and Control

Setting boundaries allows individuals to maintain a sense of agency over their lives. It empowers them to make decisions that align with their goals and values, rather than being swayed by external pressures and obligations.

Reduced Stress and Burnout

Many people struggle with saying “no” due to fear of disappointing others. However, constantly acquiescing to others’ demands can lead to burnout. Setting boundaries helps individuals manage their energy and commitments, reducing stress and enhancing overall productivity.

Challenges in Setting Boundaries

Despite its benefits, setting boundaries can be challenging, particularly for individuals who:

  • Fear Rejection or Conflict: Many people avoid setting boundaries due to a fear of being disliked or creating conflicts. 
  • Lack Role Models: If boundary-setting was not modeled during childhood, individuals may struggle to develop this skill in adulthood.
  • Feel Guilt: Some associate boundary-setting with selfishness, leading to feelings of guilt when asserting their needs.
  • Have Low Self-esteem: Individuals with poor self-esteem may doubt their right to set boundaries or prioritise their needs.

Strategies for Setting Healthy Boundaries

Identify Your Needs and Limits 

Self-awareness is the first step in setting boundaries. Reflect on what makes you feel comfortable, respected and safe in your relationships and interactions.

Communicate Clearly and Assertively

Use “I” statements to express your boundaries. For example, “I need some quiet time to recharge after work” is clearer and less confrontational than “You’re always bothering me when I get home.”

Practice Saying No

Saying no is an essential skill for maintaining boundaries. Start small by declining minor requests and gradually work up to more significant situations.

Be Consistent 

Upholding your boundaries requires consistency. If you allow exceptions too often, others may not take your boundaries seriously. 

Seek Support

Consider seeking guidance from a therapist, support group, or trusted friend if you struggle with boundary-setting. Professional help can provide tools and encouragement to navigate challenging situations. 

Case Study: Transforming Life With The Help of a Therapist

Background:

Maria, a 35-year-old marketing professional, sought therapy due to chronic stress and burnout. She described herself as a “people pleaser”, constantly taking on extra responsibilities at work and in her personal life. Maria often felt overwhelmed, resentful and unappreciated but struggled to say no for fear of disappointing others.

Therapeutic Approach:

Maria’s therapist began by helping her explore the origins of her people-pleasing tendencies. Through guided reflection, Maria realised that she equated setting boundaries with selfishness, a belief instilled during childhood. Her therapist introduced her to the concept of assertive communication and encouraged her to practice saying no in low-stakes situations.

   Maria was also tasked with identifying her personal and professional priorities by her therapist . She learned to recognise when requests conflicted with these priorities and how to decline gracefully. For example, when her boss asked her to take on an additional project, Maria responded “I’d love to help, but my current workload won’t allow me to give this the attention it deserves.

Outcome:

Over time, Maria experienced profound changes. She reported feeling less stressful and more control in her life. Her relationships improved as she began expressing her needs honestly and respectfully. While she initially feared rejection, she found that most people respected her , and those who didn’t often revealed themselves to be unhealthy influences.

   Setting boundaries is a powerful psychological act of self-care that benefits mental health, relationships, and overall quality of life. While the process may feel uncomfortable or daunting at first, the long-term rewards far overweigh the challenges. As Maria’s story illustrates, learning to set boundaries can transform not only how we interact with others but also how we view ourselves. By prioritising our well-being and asserting our needs, we can cultivate a life of balance, respect, and authenticity.

HeARTful Living

Beyond the Diagnosis: Living with Generalized Anxiety Disorder

Understanding the unseen battles of Generalized Anxiety Disorder — beyond symptoms, into the lived experience.

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Anxiety, Generalized, Disorder, GAD, Thoughts , Support

When individuals hear the term anxiety, they might reflect to times they were nerves before an exam or fidgety before a looming event. But for someone experiencing Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) — anxiety is no transient feeling — anxiety is an unwelcome and constant extra at the table, usually steering the thinking and feeling or bodily reactions at the table each day with relentless presence. 

In layman’s terms, Generalized Anxiety Disorder is the inordinate and uncontrollable worry about the affairs of daily life — work, relationships, health, the playing out of time, or even the minutiae of events. While everyone worries from time to time, someone with GAD is in a cycle of anxious thinking that feels inescapable or insurmountable.

To gather a complete understanding of GAD, we will need to move beyond diagnosis  but to the actually lived experience of those that have anxiety.

Inside the Mind of Anxiety

Consider waking up in the morning, but your first thought is not breakfast or your plans for the day; instead, it’s about what bad things could happen today. A friend didn’t text you back? Clearly they are upset with you. Your boss called you in for a meeting? He’s probably mad at you. You have a little headache this morning? It must be something big.

For those who have Generalized Anxiety Disorder, this is a daily struggle – a constant state of “what if.” The mind races ahead, finding the worst-case outcomes of even ordinary situations. This is called catastrophizing, and you don’t choose to do this. An anxious mind is hard-wired to always be prepared for a possible danger, even when it may not be present at all.

Overthinking is not just too many thoughts, it is the inability to make those thoughts stop happening. It is lying awake at night reviewing conversations, re-reviewing decisions, and trying to predict a disaster that may never happen. Overthinking is exhausting mentally, like your brain is stuck on a treadmill and you cannot stop it from running.

When Anxiety Becomes Physical

Anxiety exists beyond one’s mental state; it also has a relationship to the expressions of the body.  When a person with generalized anxiety disorder begins worrying, his or her body has a natural response as it were exposed to danger. The heart beats quickly, the breathing is shallow, muscles tense, and finally the stomach tightens.  

These phenomena can be overwhelming in the form of sweaty palms, dizziness, nausea, and trembling.  All of the the sensations are a form of the body’s natural fight or flight response.  Over time, the body can reach complete alertness, resulting in fatigue, digestive issues, and even chronic pain.  

To an outsider, it may appear to be “just stress,” but to the person it is losing control of their own body.

The Emotional Toll: Frustration, Irritation, and Helplessness

Living with ongoing anxiety is not only exhausting  it can be incredibly frustrating. Individuals with generalized anxiety disorder (GAD) experience these cycles of thoughts often feeling somewhat incapacitated. They are aware that their fears and anxieties may not be rational, yet they can’t seem to stop them. This awareness sometimes leads to self-judgment .

“Why can’t I just stop worrying?” or “Why can’t I just be normal?”, and they become frustrated with themselves.

There can be an irritability that sets in when anxiety levels rise, but it’s not that the person is angry at someone else, they are angry at the mind for not letting go of something and just giving them peace. It’s like someone is trapped inside their thoughts, and they know the thoughts are irrational, but they just can’t escape the thoughts. All this inner turmoil can lead to being tired emotionally or disconnected and sadness.

Is it any wonder that depression usually accompanies anxiety? When someone feels like they are stuck in time loop of fear and helplessness, there is no hope left They may withdraw, not engage in things they have loved in their past, or feel numb. This is not weakness  it is the normal reaction of carrying a heavy mental burden for too long.

The Social Reality: When Anxiety Becomes a Punchline

Sadly, anxiety often goes ‘misunderstood’. Friends might joke about their “overthinking” , “You worry too much,” “You’re being overdramatic,” or “Just relax!” While they may not mean harm, it hurts deeply. They’ve been told they’re too much. They’ve been made to feel different. Even well-meaning teasing simply highlights their isolation. What they feel, and what others perceive as overreaction, is often a true and physical sensation of mild discomfort to an overwhelming fear. 

For example, if things do not go as planned – a delay, a last-minute change – people within the anxious community can feel a great deal of unease. Their body might feel tight and their chest can feel heavy. It’s not about wanting control; it’s simply about feeling unsafe when the world becomes unpredictable. 

Empathy is important. What feels trivial for one may truly feel overwhelming for another.

Supporting Someone with GAD

You don’t need to attempt to “fix” someone dealing with a anxiety  you just need to be there. Some suggestions include the following:

Be an open ear without judgement. Sometimes they just need to express their fear or worry without being told they are overreacting.

Provide reassurance, but don’t take it away. Telling them “You’ll be fine,” can feel like minimization and dismissal. Instead, say “I can understand this feels hard for you right now, I’m here with you.”

Support your friend in seeking professional help. A therapist can support an anxious person and can even be life changing. A therapist that does Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) is especially useful.

Be patient; recovery takes time. Some days will be better than others.

Learn about the disorder. GAD is true disorder and learning about it allows you to react with compassion rather than frustration.

A Final Word: Beyond Fear, There is Strength

Individuals suffering from Generalized Anxiety Disorder are neither weak, nor broken they are some of the most strong people you will meet. They wake up everyday facing battles that others do not see. They work, love, laugh and try to build a life despite the noise that is intangible that is constantly playing in their minds. What they need the most is to be understood, not to be pitied, because it is only when we see past the diagnosis and focus on the person, we soon learn that anxiety is not who they are. It’s something they are working to live with  and often, overcome.

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Different Brains, Same Belonging

What is inclusion? Let’s explore the world of neurodiversity and how every child learns and feels differently.

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Brains , neurodiversity , inclusion, children , classrooms

When Aarav first joined a mainstream classroom in Bengaluru, his teacher noticed he didn’t always sit still. He hummed while doing worksheets, spoke out of turn and sometimes stared at the ceiling during lessons. Some classmates whispered that he was “weird”. Others ignored him altogether. But what the teacher didn’t yet understand was that Aarav wasn’t being difficult, he was neurodivergent, meaning his brain processed the world differently.

   In India, thousands of children like Aarav live with autism, ADHD, dyslexia or other learning differences. Yet, despite increasing awareness, inclusion often remains a policy on paper rather than a lived reality. This article explores what neurodiversity truly means, how special education can foster belonging and why understanding differences is the first step toward creating emotionally safe, inclusive schools.

What is Neurodiversity?

The term neurodiversity, coined by sociologist Judy Singer, suggests that neurological differences are a natural and valuable part of human diversity, much like ethnicity, gender or personality. Instead of viewing conditions like autism or ADHD as “disorders” to be fixed, neurodiversity encourages acceptance and support for different ways of thinking, learning and experiencing the world.

In this framework,

  • A child with dyslexia isn’t “slow” — they process language differently, often excelling in visual and creative thinking.
  • A child with autism may struggle with social communication but possess remarkable focus or pattern recognition.
  • A child with ADHD may have high energy and creativity but need help regulating attention in structured settings.

Understanding neurodiversity means shifting “What’s wrong with this child?” to “What does this child need to thrive?

The Indian Context: Progress and Gaps

India has made strikes toward inclusion — laws like the Rights of Person with Disabilities Act (2016) and the National Education Policy (2020) promote access to education to all children. Many schools have begun employing educators, shadow teachers and counsellors.

However, implementation remains uneven 

  • Many teachers lack training in inclusive strategies.
  • Parents of neurodivergent children often face stigma and isolation.
  • Classrooms with large student ratios struggle to provide individualised support. 

As a result, neurodivergent children often end up being, “present but excluded”— physically in the classroom, but emotionally disconnected.

Meera’s Journey

Meera, a 9-year-old with autism, was often misunderstood in her first school. She found it hard to make eye contact and needed more time to process instructions. Teachers mistook her silence for disobedience and classmates teased her for being “strange”.

   Her parents eventually moved her to a more inclusive school where the teacher practiced visual learning strategies, gave her sensory breaks and paired her with an empathetic peer buddy. Within months, Meera began participating in group art activities and even raised her hand in class.

    In a conversation with her mother, Meera once said softly, “This school understands my brain.”

    Her words highlight what inclusion truly means not forcing neurodivergent children to “fit in”, but reshaping environments so that they can belong.

The Psychology of Belonging

Psychologists have long recognised belongingness as a fundamental human need.

According to Maslow’s hierarchy of needs, belonging comes right after safety and before achievement.

Children who feel accepted are more likely to learn, engage and grow socially.

   For neurodivergent children, however, belonging is often conditional, based on how well they “mask” their differences. Constant masking (hiding natural behaviours to appear “normal”) can lead to anxiety, burnout and low self-esteem.

   A truly inclusive classroom values authenticity over conformity. It gives every child permission to show up as they are wiggly, quiet, curious, sensitive and still feel loved.

The Role of Teachers and Schools

  1. Universal Design of Learning (UDL)
  • Use of multiple teaching methods— visual, auditory, kinesthetic, to engage all learners.
  • Offer flexible seating and sensory-friendly spaces.
  1. Emotional Literacy
  • Teach all students about different brains and behaviours.
  • Replace “don’t do that” with “let’s find what helps you feel calm.”
  1. Peer Sensitisation
  • Encourage empathy and inclusion through class discussions or stories about diversity.
  • Normalise asking for help or needing support tools.
  1. Collaboration with Parents and Professionals
  • Regular communication between teachers, special educators and parents ensures consistent strategies at home and school.

Cultural Shifts in Understanding

In Indian society, neurodivergence often clashes with cultural ideals of obedience and conformity. Parents may feel judged, teachers overwhelmed and children unseen.

But things are slowly changing.

  • More parents are advocating for inclusion.
  • Online communities are raising awareness about neuroaffirmative education.
  • Counsellors and psychologists are helping schools understand that “different” doesn’t mean defiant.

The shift lies in realising that inclusion benefits everyone. When classrooms becomes flexible and empathetic for neurodivergent students, they also become better spaces for all children — quieter kids, anxious learners or those navigating emotional struggles.

From Awareness to Acceptance

It’s not enough to “allow” special children into the classroom, inclusion must go beyond tolerance to children.

Teachers, peers and parents can use simple, everyday actions:

  • Offer choices instead of demands.
  • Avoid public comparisons.
  • Encourage self-advocacy: “What helps you learn better?
  • Celebrate strengths — memory, imagination, empathy or persistence.

As Meera’s story shows, even one supportive teacher can change the trajectory of a child’s self-worth.

Every child’s brain tells a different story. In India’s evolving classrooms, the challenge isn’t just to “integrate” neurodivergent children— it’s to reshape the idea of normal itself. When inclusion is practised with compassion, schools become more than places of learning, they become communities of understanding.

   Because at its heart, inclusion isn’t charity, it’s justice. And the most powerful thing we can tell a child, neurodivergent or not, is this: 

You belong exactly as you are 

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The Chemical Brain : IBS and Mental Health

Your gut and mind are deeply connected, today in “The Chemical Brain” we explore this link that can help you heal both body and soul.

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Gut, brain, IBS, mental, health

We tend to refer to having a “gut feeling” or being “sick to one’s stomach.” What we don’t necessarily appreciate is how much those phrases actually hold water. Our brain and gut are intricately linked so much so that what happens in one tends to impact the other.

One of the most obvious examples of this relationship is Irritable Bowel Syndrome (IBS). IBS is a frequent digestive disorder that brings about symptoms such as stomach discomfort, bloating, gas, constipation, or diarrhea. But IBS isn’t merely a “tummy trouble” it’s a disorder that incorporates the body and mind.

The Gut–Brain Connection

Within our bodies there is a strong connection between the brain and gut known as the gut–brain axis. Consider it like a two-way telephone connection. The brain sends signals to the gut, and the gut sends signals to the brain. This communication takes place through nerves, hormones, and even the bacteria that reside within us.

That’s why when we’re feeling stressed or anxious, our stomach may respond, we may feel queasy, have “butterflies,” or have to run to the bathroom. In individuals with IBS, this nervous system connection becomes even more sensitive. The gut can respond more intensely to stress or emotions, resulting in more pain and cramping, as well as abnormal bowel movements.

In other words, stress can make IBS worse, and IBS can cause more stress creating a frustrating cycle.

How Mental Health Affects IBS

IBS isn’t “all in your head,” yet the brain has a significant role to play when it comes to experiencing and coping with symptoms. Most people with IBS also have anxiety or depression. In fact, studies have indicated that anxiety and depression occur more frequently in people with IBS than in people without IBS.

Here’s how it relates:

Stress and anxiety will alter the speed at which the gut propels its contents, resulting in diarrhea or constipation. They also make the gut more sensitive, so that pain or bloating will be experienced more acutely.

Depression will influence chemicals within the brain, such as serotonin, that regulate both mood and digestion. Curiously enough, nearly 90% of the body’s serotonin is produced in the gut not the brain!

Long-term stress can also hurt the gut microbiome the group of beneficial bacteria that maintains a healthy digestion. When that is disrupted, digestion as well as mood can be affected.

Having IBS can also have an emotional cost. Individuals tend to fear symptoms would trigger in public or during travel. Some will limit dining out or parties altogether. Eventually, this would make individuals lonely, frustrated, and anxious  again demonstrating the close relationship between the gut and the mind.

A Whole-Person View: Body and Mind Together

Physicians and therapists now consider IBS to be a biopsychosocial illness. This implies that biology (gut and body), psychology (thoughts and feelings), and social influences (interpersonal relationships, support, and way of life) are all involved.

Therefore, treatment for IBS is most effective when it deals with both the body and the mind. Dietary adjustments frequently make a difference, but mental health treatment can also have a significant impact.

Ways to Help Gut and Mental Health

The following are some treatments and techniques that research indicates can help:

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT):

 This type of talk therapy assists individuals in learning how their thoughts, feelings, and actions impact their symptoms. It also educates individuals on coping skills to manage stress and decrease fear surrounding IBS.

Mindfulness and Relaxation

Practices such as meditation, deep breathing, or yoga can soothe both your mind and your gut. Mindfulness makes you aware of your body’s cues without responding to them with tension or panic.

Gut-Directed Hypnotherapy:

This is a unique type of hypnosis in which specially trained therapists lead you through soothing imagery that enables your brain and your gut to speak more effectively to each other. It’s been proven to diminish pain and bloating in most individuals with IBS.

Medication Support:

Doctors sometimes prescribe small amounts of antidepressants  not just for mood, but because they will also suppress pain and sensitivity in the gut.

Lifestyle and Diet:

Having smaller meals, evenly balanced, finding out which foods trigger problems (such as caffeine or very fatty foods), regular sleep, and gentle exercise can all be effective in controlling symptoms of IBS.

The Role of Social Support

Discussing problems with digestion can be embarrassing, but don’t keep it to yourself. Most people with IBS feel isolated, but the illness is extremely prevalent. Support groups, online or in person, can allow you to share what you’re experiencing and know that others know what you’re going through.

Having empathetic friends, family, or even colleagues can do a world of good in helping to lower stress which, by the way, helps soothe the gut.

Breaking the Gut–Mind Cycle

Healing from IBS is not curing it overnight , it’s learning to balance and listen to your body. When you take care of your mental well-being, your gut tends to respond well. And when you make your gut happier, your mood tends to lift too.

The most important thing to keep in mind: IBS is not your fault. It’s a genuine physical condition with strong emotional connections. With the proper blend of attention like  medical, psychological, and lifestyle  it can be well managed, enabling you to lead a full, healthy, and serene life.

Your stomach has a voice. Getting to know it and quieting the mind behind it  can be one of the most therapeutic quests of all.

References 

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The Cost of Being a “Good Child”

“Be quiet”, “Stop crying”, “You’re so sensitive” are all the things a child often hears. But what are the consequences of these phrases? Let’s explore how.

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In many Indian homes, children are taught to be obedient, respectful and “well-behaved”. These are beautiful values in themselves but often, somewhere in this process, children also learn something unintended: to stay silent about their emotions.

   Crying, anger or even disappointment can be met with phrases like “Don’t overreact” or “Strong kids don’t cry.” Over time, children may stop expressing what they feel, not because they don’t feel deeply but because they’ve learned it’s safer to keep those feelings hidden.

   This article explores the psychology behind emotional suppression in Indian culture, how it shapes adulthood and why helping children name, express and regulate their emotions can transform their well-being.

Riya’s Story 

Riya, a bright 10-year-old girl from Pune, often came home quietly after school. Her teacher described her as “disciplined and mature for her age.” But at home, her mother noticed that Riya would sometimes cry alone in her room or snap over small things.

   When they met with a counsellor, Riya hesitated at first, but slowly said, “I just don’t like when people shout. I feel like I did something wrong even when I didn’t.

   Through therapy it became clear that Riya’s emotional world was full but unspoken. At school, she had learned to be “the good girl”, to not argue, not show sadness and never appear “too sensitive.” Her parents, loving but strict, valued calmness and control, believing that “strong children don’t cry.”

   Riya’s story is not rare— it mirrors many Indian households where children are deeply loved but raised to manage emotions silently. 

Why Indian Children Struggle to Express Emotions

Cultural Conditioning

Indian culture emphasises respect, hierarchy and emotional restraint. Children often learn to prioritise family harmony over personal expression. 

  • A boy showing fear may be told, “Be brave, don’t cry like a girl.
  • A girl expressing anger may hear, “Don’t talk back.

These phrases, though well-intentioned, teach emotional suppression.

Generational Beliefs 

Many Indian parents grew up without a language for emotions themselves. Their parenting, while loving, may unintentionally repeat that pattern.

Collectivism over Individualism

In a collective culture, emotions that disrupt family or community peace are often seen as selfish or immature. Children learn to adjust rather than assert.

Academic and Behavioural Expectations

Schools often value compliance and performance over emotional development. A quiet child is praised for being “disciplined”, even when silence hides distress.

The Psychological Impact of Emotional Suppression

When emotions are consistently bottled up, they don’t disappear, they turn inward or leak out in unhealthy ways.

  • Anxiety and Somatic Symptoms: Children who suppress emotions often develop stomach aches, headaches or sleep problems before exams or conflicts
  • Low Self-Esteem: If emotions are met with dismissal, children may believe their feelings don’t matter.
  • Difficulty in Relationships: As adults, such children may struggle with boundaries, communication or emotional intimacy.
  • Emotional Flooding: Years of suppression can lead to sudden emotional outbursts, confusion or even panic attacks.

Psychologist Daniel Goleman, known for his work on Emotional Intelligence, emphasises that emotional awareness and regulation are key to success and well-being, not the absence of emotion but understanding it.

Relearning Expression: The Role of Parents and Families 

Validate Feelings, Don’t Dismiss Them

When a child says, “I’m scared”, instead of responding with, “There’s nothing to be scared of,” try, “I understand that must feel scary, let’s talk about it.” Validation teaches emotional safety.

Name the Emotion Together

Children often don’t have the vocabulary to describe feelings. Parents can help by naming them: “You look frustrated.”, or “That made you angry, didn’t it?” 

Model Healthy Emotional Behaviour 

Children learn more from what we do than what we say. If parents express their own emotions calmly, like admitting, “I’m feeling stressed, I need a moment.”, children learn that feelings are normal, not shameful.

Create Emotional Rituals 

Families can include daily “feedback check-ins,” storytime conversations or gratitude moments at dinner. These small practices make emotions part of everyday life.

Encourage Creative Outlets

Drawing, storytelling, music or play can be powerful tools for children to express what they can’t yet verbalise 

Healing the Cycle

When adults like Riya’s parents begin to understand their own emotional patterns, they often find healing too. Many realise they grew up suppressing their feelings to please their parents or avoid conflict and are now unknowingly passing that silence forward.

   Breaking this cycle doesn’t mean rejecting culture, it means evolving it. Emotional intelligence and respect can coexist. A child who feels safe expressing themselves doesn’t become rebellious, they become secure

   Children in India grow up surrounded by immense love but sometimes, that love is expressed through discipline, expectation or quiet endurance rather than open emotion. Teaching children that feelings are not weaknesses but messages from within can reshape generations.

   When we make space for children to cry, question, laugh loudly or express anger safely, we raise not only emotionally intelligent individuals but a more compassionate society.

   Because the truth is, every child feels deeply. They just need permission to be heard. 

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The Chemical Brain: Understanding PCOS and Mental Health

Beyond hormones and symptoms, in this article we are going to understanding how PCOS rewires your brain, body, and emotional world.

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PCOS, chemical, brain, hormones, emotional, mental health

We usually discuss Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS) when it comes to irregular periods, weight changes, or hormonal imbalance. But what if we told you PCOS doesn’t only reside in your ovaries — it resides in your brain as well?

In this issue of The Chemical Brain, we’re going to uncover what actually goes on in the mind of a person with PCOS. We’ll venture past irritability or mood swings, into biology, psychology, and lived experience  how PCOS reconfigures how you think, feel, and perceive yourself in subtle, unseen ways.

Because what you know about the chemistry of your feelings isn’t only empowering it’s healing.

What’s Really Happening Inside the Body

PCOS is a hormonal imbalance, so your body will create more androgens (hormones such as testosterone, usually present in higher levels in men). It will also disrupt your estrogen, progesterone, and insulin levels all of which are important for not just your reproductive system, but also your mind and emotions.

These hormonal shifts cascade throughout your body and impact your neurotransmitters: the brain’s chemical messengers. Neurotransmitters such as:

Serotonin: Affects mood and stability of emotions.

Dopamine: Controls motivation and pleasure.

GABA: Assists in controlling anxiety and induces calm.

When your hormones change, these neurotransmitters misfire or get sluggish. That’s why PCOS can cause not only bodily changes, but emotional upheaval as well anxiety, mood swings, irritability, and even symptoms of depression aren’t “all in your head.” They’re in your chemistry.

 The Brain–Hormone Feedback Loop

Your hormones and your brain are constantly talking to each other — a two-way radio of feedback and signals. The brain tells your glands to release hormones, and those hormones then instruct your brain how to feel, react, and manage your energy.

In PCOS, this feedback loop can get knotted up:

Insulin resistance changes the way glucose (your brain’s fuel) is absorbed — impacting energy and concentration.

Cortisol (your stress hormone) will remain elevated — heightening anxiety and tiredness.

Estrogen swings can disrupt serotonin, which influences mood and sleep.

The outcome? Your mood can be as volatile as your hormones. You may feel wired, drained, or emotionally numb without any apparent cause — because your brain and body are struggling to get back into balance.

The Emotional Cost of Body Symptoms

And then there’s the other side of PCOS ,the one that exists in mirrors and photos.

Growing facial hair, acne, hair loss, gaining weight that you can’t seem to control — these things can affect how you feel about yourself deeply. It’s not vanity, it’s psychology.

Our own culture tends to view beauty and worth as being equal to thinness or flawless skin. So when your body acts in ways that don’t fit that script, it can insidiously wear away at your confidence. You may begin to feel disconnected from your own reflection — a psychological phenomenon known as body dysmorphia, where your view of your body is skewed by distress.

This constant pressure can cause social withdrawal, comparison, or even a chronic sense of failure  especially when you’re trying so hard to “fix” things your body refuses to change overnight.

Living With a Misunderstood Condition

One of the hardest parts about PCOS is how invisible it can feel.

Since everyone’s symptoms are different, it is common for people to end up being told things such as “just lose weight” or “relax.” Well-intentioned as these words may be, they dismiss your experience and serve as an additional source of frustration.

Studies indicate that PCOS sufferers are three times more likely to suffer from depression and anxiety compared to those without PCOS. And it’s not only biology ,it’s the psychological weight of being forever in charge of a condition that’s underdiagnosed, underdebated, and frequently misinterpreted.

Healing the Chemical Brain

Recovery from PCOS involves nurturing both the hormonal body and the emotional brain. Neither can ever heal alone.

Here’s what a balanced strategy might look like:

Medical care: Collaborate with your endocrinologist or gynecologist. Drugs such as metformin (for insulin control) or hormonal therapy can level mood indirectly by adjusting body chemistry.

Therapy: Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) and body image–oriented therapy can be used to combat the critical inner voice and restore self-compassion.

Lifestyle care: Gentle exercise, regular sleep, and balanced eating regulate cortisol and insulin, maintaining emotional balance.

Community connection: Connect with PCOS support groups. Embracing each other’s stories diminishes shame and reminds you — you’re not alone in this.

Most importantly, keep this in mind: your symptoms aren’t your fault. Hormonal disorders don’t define your worth, femininity, or discipline. They’re a medical condition and you deserve understanding, not judgment.

 The Takeaway

PCOS isn’t simply about cysts or cycles — it’s about chemistry, connection, and compassion.

Your brain, your hormones, and your emotions are all speaking the same language they just need to be heard together. Once you start learning about your chemical brain, you release yourself from blaming yourself for the symptoms and start collaborating with your body rather than fighting it.

You are not broken. You’re learning a new rhythm ,a rhythm that respects your mind, your body, and your beautiful, complex chemistry.

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